 I was having a fascinating conversation with my husband and his mother about childhood memories. The conversation started as a bit of a debate as to whether or not it was possible that a memory he had from childhood was real or if he had remembered the incident from a story the family had shared with him at a later time. Throughout the discussion it became clear that not only did he remember the incident but that his memory was independent of her own account and that the impact of the memory had a profound impact on his personal beliefs about dogs. All this left me pondering the power of our memories and their effect on our beliefs.
My work and training as a hypnotherapist has allowed me to see the negative effect memories can have on a persons life. One of the basic premises in hypnotherapy is that our minds retain a memory of every experience we've ever had - good or bad. For me the interesting thing is which memories we consciously choose to recall and how that recollection can become a personal belief. For example, if a person is bitten by a dog early on in their life they may form the opinion that ALL dogs will bite. This could lead them to go beyond a healthy fear of aggressive dogs to a phobia of any dog. It seems to me that how we feel about the memory determines how we feel about the subject of the memory. Once we make a judgment of whether the memory is good or bad then we color the subject in the same light and subsequently develop association with future experiences to support that judgment until it becomes a belief. The beauty of Hypnosis and NLP is that they can allow us to view the original incident from an objective point of view and choose to see it as neutral. This work then can create a new association with the subject and help the individual overcome a phobia or even change a belief.
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 When we begin to see the truth of who we are, outside the parameters, beliefs, and constraints of other peoples opinions, then we are free to live authentically. We can take ourselves seriously or keep things light on a whim. Once our mind is our own we can wield it's tremendous power to transform our lives from one moment to the next. The key is to let go, to release any idea of the should have's or would have's of life that were imposed on us from the outside and instead do what feels right and genuine and good from within.
Some call it the still small voice, others the soul, the inner guide, the Christ mind. It doesn't matter what name we use most of us know it when we hear it... or better yet feel it. That little tug to turn right instead of left, a nagging feeling that we forgot something or should call someone out of the blue. I call it our divine center - our true north. Like a compass it will always point you home. The eternal Home - a place where you are at peace, in perfect alignment with your natural sense of well being and purpose, a place where everything just feels right. Home gives us the power we need to continue growing, the safety to follow our inspirations, the burning desire to share our own gifts with the world. If all of us spent more time connected to our Home within then perhaps we would not feel like lost children - scared, angry, frightened and alone. Maybe then there would be less need to find fault or trample over others in an unconscious desire to gain a sense of power and mistaken safety. Finding Home comes from finding our true selves. Doing this requires us to be self-aware, to know what it is that we believe. It requires us to listen to our own divine center - to say yes, when we mean it and no when we mean it - without regret or disdain. As we begin to live from this true north we can heal ourselves and become whole again. Day by day, we can return Home.  So many clients come to me seeking advice or tips on how to grow or start their own business. Sadly they are often their own worst enemy. One of the first questions I might asks is how do you let people know what you do? To which, I most often get the standard reply of business coming via word of mouth or direct referral. When I ask how many business cards, fliers, or brochures they hand out per day/week the numbers are typically abysmal.
In fact, some of them don't even TELL people they meet what they do unless they are asked. I mean, it's pretty crazy to think you'll be able to expand your business in any extensive way simply by waiting for the phone to ring. The good news is even the most reserved person can become a sought after expert without having to give an elevator speech to perfect strangers. Even better, with simple online resources tools like Thumbtack, a new business can have leads pouring into via phone, e-mail or text message. Click HERE for an example of how it works!  Someone recently said that I didn't realize how many other women would die to be in my shoes. He said they would love to be able to set my own hours, do work that I love and still be able to spend as much time as they wanted with my their own child. I couldn't help but smile at the sentiment and I will certainly be the first to admit I am absolutely filled with gratitude every time I hold my beautiful little boy. Still, when I think back to that conversation I have to shake my head in disagreement, it is not luck that's brought me here, well at least not luck alone. So much of what lays before me now has long been in the planning stages. I have always been a firm believer in following your dreams, not blindly and without effort but fearlessly and fiercely. Like a mother bear protecting her young I knew I had to guard each heartfelt desire against any enemy. The foes of my dreams included the chiding and hand-ringing worries of so-called well-wishers bent on helping me avoid their own imagined pitfalls, the jealous friends and co-workers who wanted to keep me blind-folded and locked in step with their corporate crowd, all the while I had my own inner gremlins to fend against, little whispering beasts of self-doubt, pity and regret. Now, standing at one of the many high points of my life, I look back and realize my successful achievements have not only been a labor of love, determination but also a consistent focus to always reach for what I wanted and to choose to leap fearlessly into the arms of lady luck whenever she crossed my path. With every leap I became more convinced that I truly could have, do and be anything I wanted - with the right plan, the right attitude and yes, even with a little bit of luck. Below is the YouTube video that brought over 10,000 views. As a Clinical Hypnotherapist I wanted to offer people - across the globe - access to a sample of my work. Not only because I feel that the message is valuable but also because I think there are those individuals who could benefit greatly from hypnosis techniques but who are afraid of what those techniques might be. The solution I found was simple - give it away - let people dip their foot in the pond of subconscious change as it were. I dare say, it has been a big success. From the comments I received I believe it not only allowed people to learn more but perhaps gave many of them the added benefit of opening up to greater abundance in their lives. Now that is what I call a win-win! Check it out for yourself and tell us what you think. Is it even possible to raise a fearless child? To create an early childhood environment that supports the idea that life is inherently good, people are generally kind, and that there is a Universal source of unlimited power that lovingly supports you in living out your own true purpose. These were the constant thoughts that returned to me regularly during my pregnancy. The underlying question remained constant; how do you raise a fearless child? I wasn't sure how it was possible but I knew it was my duty to do everything in my power to give it a try.
My first opportunity to test this theory came when my then four-month old son had his first hard-hitting cold. It was heartbreaking and a little scary to watch him struggle to breathe through his stuffy nose and hack through his heavily congested cough. Still, I knew his body was doing what it was supposed to do. The challenge, how do you let a four month old know that his body was healing itself? I knew he would get better soon; though his getting better couldn’t come soon enough for me or my husband. This was a chance for me to teach him to be fearless in the face of discomfort. It was his opportunity to learn to trust that things would be better. Even though I couldn’t explain it to him verbally, I could let him know through non-verbal communication that he was safe and that he would feel better soon. I held him close, kept him as comfortable as possible with lots of fluids and soothing steam sessions, and cooed softly in his ear over and over that he would be okay. In the end, it all came down to the common sense, the best thing I could do was stay calm, supportive and refrain from filling his personal space with unnecessary worries or fears. There were no midnight runs to emergency when he spit up more than usual, or mad dashes to the pharmacy for prescription strength cough medicine, or panicked pleas to the heavens for miracle relief. Instead, I decided to take my own medicine, I needed to overcome my own fears. To raise a fearless child I have to be fearless in the face of life's obstacles, I have to show him that it is safe to trust our bodies, and that in the end things will turn out okay. The good news was that as I expected he was soon feeling better and even his cough quickly began to wane. Soon as he began to play gleefully in his little walker at my feet, it became clear the cold had officially passed and he was no worse for the wear. I like to think, hopefully, the lesson that life is good, he is safe, and I will always be there came shining through in the end. One of the challenges of being a seeker in life is that we often find ourselves searching the world we see outside. We look to other people, places and even times to find meaning or purpose in our own lives. When the truth is the only purpose we can fully engage is the one that burns within us. Whatever we see outside, for good or ill, it is only a reflection of the real person, place or event. We simply can't know the full depth of anything that is not of our own making or experience. In NLP (Neural Linguistic Programming) we abide by the premise that "The Map is NOT the Territory". In other words, I can show you a map of Texas, I can even include as much detail as will fit on the page but the true experience of living and being a part of that place can only be realized through experience and even then because said experience is subjective it will be different for each individual. For some the experience of Texas is a broad open space of desolate land and endless oil rigs. For others it's the heartland of Americana and all things country. It could even be seen as a black mark on society for those who's experience and memories evoke images of slavery, the Klan, the Alamo. None of this is transmitted to the viewer when he/she looks at a map of Texas. So, it is for our lives and the world we see outside ourselves, even being in the space we can only catch a glimpse at what we call reality. The rest is a co-creative masterpiece beyond our individual scope. The beautiful thing is that science has proven that as creators we have the POWER to shift and shape that reality. We do that by holding visions and creating beliefs about what we want to see in our world. Take a look at the following video excerpt, The POWER of Belief, from the former POWER Plan program (Now the Master Creators Academy). Remember, the best way to FIND your way is to create it! Many of my clients who are in career transition often find themselves trapped in in-action. They know there is something more they should be doing with their life and feel as if they are not living in line with their purpose. Whether they have been laid off or are struggling un-successfully through their current job the bottom line is they are not satisfied with what they are doing for employment and they keep banging their head on the wall asking, what do I do now? What is it that will make them happy, fulfilled, successful? Often, there is something calling out from deep in their soul that is not being expressed. This leaves them feeling disconnected or dissatisfied with their current efforts and sometimes they aren't really even sure what it is. They just KNOW what it isn't. Usually, the one thing they know is that it isn't what they are currently doing for work. Some have been in the same field for so long they don't even think they are capable of doing anything else. Luckily, I get to remind them that as long as they are breathing anything is possible. Despite the tired excuses running around in their head of someone being younger, wiser, having more experience, they have the capacity to learn, grow, change and succeed no matter what. One of the best tools we have at Divine Strategy is the Authentic Role Worksheet. This simple worksheet helps my clients look at their natural talents, god-given-gifts, personal inspirations and spiritual beliefs to create a framework for their own Unique Life Purpose. Below is a quick demonstration on how to utilize this 4 step process to create your own ULP. Watch the video then download the form and share your UniqueLife Purpose with us in the comments below!  Something about this blustery weather has me turning inside. Perhaps it's a settling into the dark, cold days of winter that's got my mind feeling reflective and even a bit melancholy, but whatever it is I know I am in a state of deep and mindful fermentation. There are definitely changes brewing within my life and soul. I am feeling my way through this hallow season by seeking to surround myself with all the things that comfort me. First, I was drawn to pull my pashmina scarves from their hiding spot in the hall closet, instantly leaning toward the colors of warm pumpkin and green apple. Their lush folds felt like a warm cozy blanket around my neck to ward off the Fall chill as I went off to hunt down holiday gifts. Yes, I am an early shopper, I find it helps me to get and stay in the holiday spirit. Pulling on my insulated ski coat and bright polka-dotted galoshes helped me to feel toasty and safe as I traveled in and out of the crisp air making my way from store to store. Fall's bounty was captivating, I found myself unable to resist picking up added treats to warm my home, a set of new scented candles of bayberry and cinnamon-cranberry, each filling my nose and mind with fragrant memories of crunching leaves and hot mulled wine, a cozy new knitted hat and even a hearty meal of bratwurst and sauerkraut to stew in the crockpot. Everything bringing me to a sense of returning to my inner hearth and home. Now as I sit typing this, a warm mug of tea by my side, the wind howls outside the window and I watch the last few leaves of the tree flutter helplessly against the inevitable falling to come. A gentle reminder, I think, that clinging to one's past can be far more painful than the sweet release of accepting life's inevitable and often cyclical change. Or it might just be the echo of a memory drawing me home a sweet somber call from the hallows of Fall.  I didn't know what to expect when I returned to my childhood home. The property smelled the same, crisp and lush, and the light filtering through the trees as I climbed the steep driveway (now, after 16 years, fully cemented) I had trod up and down for years as a young girl. The feeling of walking back in time lingered as I took each step. It was as if I half expected my family to be waiting for me at the top of the hill.
Instead what I found was someone I had left behind, many years before, my own inner oracle. The voice that had inspired and steadied me through the darkest moments of my childhood. The divine guidance that was constant had been set aside as I became an adult. It was clear as I stood on that road that she was ready to come home too. Come home she did! As I stepped off that road and climbed back into my car I actually felt different - more complete - like all the pieces of me had been silently shuffled back into full alignment. It didn't take long for her to speak up and now I have given her a platform to share her - unfiltered - wisdom and guidance with the world. The truth is, it's nice to have her back. As a recent client stated, she is really just me - the real me coming back to the light. So, if you are open to receiving the messages the Universe has for you then be sure to visit this page often. The Oracle is back.... and she's here on purpose! |
"It was so great to talk with Lia. She asked many thought provoking questions and gave me many great ideas! Highly recommend and look forward to continuing our discussions!" tHE ORACLEDivine guidance and wisdom from the eternal sage. She speaks, I listen and then I type. The views and opinions shared here are intended as inspiration and are provided without edit or intervention. By choosing to read and engage with this site you agree that you understand that the information given is not a replacement for professional guidance or treatment. Ask The Oracle a question on our contact page and watch this page for an answer. Archives
March 2019
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